WITH court records reflecting a sharp rise in khula cases — averaging over 70-80 per day in some regions — it is time to confront the deeper social decay affecting marriages in Pakistan. As a lawyer, I see growing domestic abuse, lack of compatibility, and emotional neglect as key reasons behind these separations. Too often, marriages are arranged in society without real consideration for compatibility. Parents choose partners based on tradition or convenience, not on the basis of emotional or intellectual alignment. Many girls have big dreams in their eyes, but end up in stifling homes after marriage, stripped of their autonomy, education and even dignity. They are even married to much older individuals, and then the in-laws sort of gang up against the newcomers, monitoring their every move. Such stories are not rare.
What is worse is the sheer silence of many parents, who, after marrying their daughters off, urge them to ‘adjust’. They should actually be offering real help, but they hardly ever do. This pressure can become deadly, pushing women towards depression or even suicide. The fact is that marriages, like other social institution, need foundation based on mutual respect, understanding and compatibility. What is more common in our case is an environment of inequality, fear and forced silence. Parents must take responsibility. They must ensure that the marriage contracts reflect genuine protection — deferred dower, financial security and legal safeguards. We must stop treating marriage as an end in itself, and start treating it as a lifelong partnership. A failed marriage is not shameful, but a destroyed life is. Let our daughters live, learn and dream. And if must walk away to survive, let us all together support them.
SYED REHMAN HAYDER
CHINIOT
